My Pint-Sized Ranter

Stupid goddamned wallpaper.  Apparently the method of installation involved driving a steamroller up and down the walls to be sure it stuck there but good.  Who the hell puts wallpaper in their house anyhow?  I'm trying to decide between continuing to scrape it off a millimeter at a time or just buying the house next door.  But I'm ready to begin the battle anew because today  I borrowed a steamer from my friend.  (Of course, between the hot steam and the use of a stepladder, I fully expect to need skin grafts in areas I can scarcely contemplate.)  David took the silver spoon out of his mouth long enough to inform me, "You know, you can hire a pro to do that for you, Mom."

Speaking of that little darling, I think he may be a blogger-in-training.  Why, he's already written his very first rant!  As I am a mean mom, I have my kids do some math and writing work over the summer.  The whole thing takes maybe 30 minutes out of the day and we've probably only done it 7 times since school ended.  Now, David is a smart child and he picks things up quickly.  What he hates is being corrected.  Unfortunately, he must've been sick the day they learned how to estimate in math class because he consistently screws it up.  I sat down with him yesterday and gently explained what he was doing wrong.  Did I mention how much he loves that?  After the Math Drama (now with tears!) he was ready to move on to writing.  I don't care what he writes about as long as he types up a well-constructed paragraph with complete sentences and accurate spelling and punctuation.  Here's what he wrote:

Numbers are stupid! There are many reasons why I hate Numbers. One reason is that is that if you add numbers you get Math problems, and with math problems you get school, and with school you get home work, and I hate Home work. Also with problems you get them wrong, and then you get really angry when you find out and have to redo them. With numbers you also count and counting is very boring. There are also games with numbers like Yahtzee, and thoseare boring as well. Numbers are the stupidest things on earth and I will always hate them.