Thursday, April 26, 2007

Hiccups

When I get the hiccups, everybody knows it.  I don't get delicate little airy hics.  I get the kind that actually say hic-CUP.  Distinct, loud two-syllable hiccups.  If I get them once, I am almost always bound to get them twice more that day.  The children get exasperated with me especially if I am trying to read <hic-CUP> out loud <hic-CUP> to <hic-CUP> them.  The other day, Juliana actually yelled at me to "Stop that hiccuping!"  I entertained the notion of giving her a little lesson on bodily reflexes in a way that would most likely land me in prison.  (Plus, there's nothing like telltale hiccuping when you're trying to hide from the cops.)

David had a better suggestion.  One that involved a glass of water.  He told me that I should take 10 swallows of water without breathing.  I visualized myself with lungs full of water and suggested to him that he was trying to end more than my hiccups.   I wondered why he didn't stop pussyfooting around and say, "Mommy, I have a great way to stop  your hiccups.  Take a gun.  Point it at your head.  Pull the trigger."

And just so you know.  During all this, I was sitting on the floor reading to Juliana.  I hiccuped so violently that the back of my head slammed against the wall.  A hiccup injury.  Top that.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

A hiccup injury is as unique as cutting oneself on soup.  I'm so proud.

Anonymous said...

What IS up with multi hiccup episodes in one day????? I get that all time (when I get the hiccups). I HATE hiccups; they always give me a headache. You were lucky enough to give yourself a headache in a special unique way. B/c you're special, ya know.

Now I'll probably get the hiccups four times tomorrow.

Anonymous said...

LOLOL - you are so special, Janet!