Recipe For A Perfect Morning

1.  When your alarm goes off at 6:15 so you can get up and exercise, lie there and register your cramps, then shoot awake in a panic realizing that you forgot to do your Tooth Fairy role last night. 

2.  Run downstairs, find a dollar, run back upstairs and sneak into Juliana's dark room.  As you slide your hand under the pillow, hear Juliana whisper, "I haven't checked yet." 

3.  Check together, find the tooth and the note to the Tooth Fairy still intact.   Rack your uncaffeinated mind then point out that since she's lost two teeth in three days, maybe the Tooth Fairy wasn't expecting to come back so soon. 

4.  Give up any thoughts of exercising and snuggle with your daughter in your bed.  Try to convince her not to turn 7 tomorrow.  Six has been a really great year.

5.  When it's finally time to get up, send her to the bathroom then scramble back to exchange the tooth for a dollar.  Shove the note asking "Dear Tooth Fairy, What do you use our teeth for?  Please leave an answer." behind the headboard so you can pretend like the Tooth Fairy never saw it. 

6.  Take the kids to school along with two dozen cupcakes for Juliana's class.  Have a cupcake emergency on the way as one of the packages slides off the other and opens just enough to toss half the cupcakes onto their sides.  (By the way, if I had a band, I would totally name it Cupcake Emergency.)

7.  Get snipped at by the school secretary for daring to interrupt her as you attempt to do yet another volunteer job for the school.

8.  Run around the school like a mad-woman because it's an early release day and you don't want to spend all morning there.

9.  Realize that on top of your cramps, you have a headache from wearing your brand new progressive lens bifocals.  Stop to ponder how old and run down you are.

10.  Have a hot flash that necessitates you coming home and putting on a fresh shirt.  Toss that sweaty shirt into the third load of laundry you're already on.

11.  Savor the thought of a nice long weekend with your darling children.  They'll be home at lunchtime today and they don't go back to school until Wednesday.