You'll be glad to know that I maintained my lengthy streak of hitting my head on the "overhead" (embedded in head?) compartment on the flight home. This time, instead of standing up directly under it, I somehow managed to whack the side of my head against it.
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On the flight home, Juliana finished her book. I watched to see if she would need some help from me to choose her next activity, but she closed up the book, announced "Ok, now I'm going to do my thinking", propped her chin on her fist, and stared off into middle distance for a nice long while.
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Who are these people who order tomato juice on airplanes? Do you know anyone who drinks tomato juice in real life? Why, on planes, does it suddenly become the drink of choice? I have such an irrational hatred for these people that even I am baffled by it.
There's only one way to drink tomato juice. First off, it has to be V-8. Secondly, it needs to be poured from its original container into a glass jar. Then it has to sit in the refrigerator until thoroughly chilled. Then you have to spend all day at the beach. Then you can enjoy a nice big glass. I'm not being unreasonable here; it's just that there is a process that needs to be followed. Oh, and did I mention that the refrigerator needs to reside in my grandparents' apartment in Florida? And that it needs to be somewhere around 1978? Is that so hard to do?
I've tried drinking V-8 other times and other ways and it doesn't work. When I was pregnant with David and all vegetables disgusted me, I thought V-8 was the answer. Nope, couldn't even gag down one glass of that viscous nastiness. And don't tell me that what I need to do is drink a Bloody Mary. Christ, how can you drink anything with "Bloody" right in the name? Not to mention TOMATO JUICE. I feel a little queasy even staying on this subject for so long.
Look, if you're thirsty on a plane, drink something cold and quenching. Like
a soda. Like normal people do. Tomato juice is just going to make you
thirstier. Plus, it's made from squished up TOMATOES. Why the hell would you drink that? And
for God's sake, when it inevitably spills on your lap, you are going to
look like a crime scene exhibit. Also, I secretly pray for turbulence when I see people drinking tomato juice on a plane. Wouldn't it be better for you to have a nice glass of orange juice? Look what you get in return: A healthy dose of vitamin C and the added bonus of helping me in my quest to become a better person.
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3 comments:
Have you considered that the reason you keep whacking your head on things is that your horns stick out farther than you think?
Pardon me..............I can't be your friend anymore! I drink V-8 everyday :P
Now, we all KNOW the real airplane drink is GINGER ALE!
Oh my, I see you have become quite narrowminded in your old age. I personally also find tomato juice (or how about clamato?? PUKE!) to be to be as appealing as slug mucus.......however, when it (tomato juice, NOT clamato) is dumped over a ton of ice and generously mixed with vodka, tobasco, and worchestershire sauce it becomes a delightful breakfast! Screw mimosas. :)S
AND..if you can't get beyond the title, pretend you're English and call it Bloody Merry!
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